Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Top 10 Differences Between Navy JAG TADs and Navy Nurse TADs

1. Lawyers sleep on at least a queen-sized bed.
Nurses get a cot with a sleeping bag.

2. Lawyers get a mini-bar.
Nurses get a vending machine.

3. Lawyers call the front desk for a wake-up call.
Nurses hear "Reveille, reveille, all hands heave out and trice up..." on the 1MC.

4. Lawyers call maid service for additional pillows.
Nurses stuff hands under their heads or double up their sleeping bags.

5. Lawyers eat at a 5-star restaurant suggested by the concierge.
Nurses crawl into government vans and ride to the chow hall.

6. Lawyers enjoy luxurious showers with the latest amenities.
Nurses enjoy brief showers with at least 5 other women, restock the heads with toilet paper from the supply locker, and wait for their turn at the sink.

7. Lawyers enjoy catered working lunches.
Nurses steal MREs from the Fleet Hospital stash.

8. Lawyers sit in air-conditioned conference facilities.
Nurses lay down in the dirt and let others practice dragging them around so everyone is familiar with the latest casualty movement techniques.

9. Lawyers order rounds and initiate hangovers.
Nurses take incoming rounds, get casualties "off the X," and stop extremity hemorrhages with a C-A-T.

10. Lawyers are familiar with the latest travel regs and would never tolerate 4 legs on an itinerary that resulted in more than 18 hours in the air.
Nurses return from their TAD and are aghast to learn they should have requested a business upgrade.