Wednesday, January 21, 2015

The Curse of the Firstborn: "Don't Be A Baby."

They got on the elevator at the 5th floor. It was evident he had been crying, this maybe 3-year old boy with yellow hair and tear-stained cheeks. His dad and grandmother accompanied him, the father standing next to his son who was hugging the railing around the elevator, while the grandmother took the opposite side of the elevator, next to me and the door buttons.

"He looks sad," I said. The father glanced at his son then at me. "His mother is having a baby and he wanted to stay with her," he said. "He's just upset because he didn't like being yelled at."

I thought about that. I don't like being yelled at either. But I didn't say anything. They let us out of the elevator first and I could hear the little boy breaking into sobs. My heart broke a little when I overheard the man say, "Why are you being a baby? Stop crying." Pause. "Why are you crying? You can't even tell me why you're crying."

He doesn't get it, this man. This boy's life is changing forever---after tonight, he'll never be an only child again. And everyone's going to dote on the new baby, cooing and smiling. Oh, sure, he'll get attention, too, but he's not NEW anymore. Oh, the curse of the firstborn and the self-aware.

Monday, January 12, 2015

Where, oh where, is my Jimmy Dean Bacon Lovers Roll Sausage?

Jimmy Dean Sausage
Only Jimmy Dean Hot, Maple and Sage Sausage available. MILD is sold out!
I haven't been able to find Jimmy Dean Bacon Lovers Roll Sausage ANYWHERE. I've been to Giant, Shoppers, WalMart, Safeway, and my local military commissary. This just doesn't exist in my part of the world.

I'm a BzzAgent so I get to try out all sorts of fun things and I've been carrying my coupon for a free roll to try and have been handing out coupons to my friends to get their sausage-bacon thrill on for awhile. I'm kind of surprised that the campaign ends on 21 JAN, because I think this would be AWESOME to feature at a Superbowl party. Maybe it'll be in stock somewhere I shop and I can feature this on some massive meaty nachos, some huge stuffed baked potatoes, or on a homemade pizza. My mouth is watering just thinking about this.

Jimmy Dean, can you help me out?